oh noooo @PostMasterGeneral you're not even safe at the grocery store from the toothy menace

gross & mushy 

Lmao. O hurt his back somehow and this is our last text exchange. He is the perfect man lmao

@CaribenxMarciaX Hiii. I feel like I haven't seen you in forever 💔 Hope your work is going well. Ok byyyeee

ok. y'all know me. you KNOW how much I love dinosaurs. But please. PLEASE. do not let this absolute skidmark of a human being make a Jurassic Park

My legs to me while climbing the stairs up and down into my office after doing a leg day workout:

Happiest of birthdays to @williamjoel , the cutest Uptown Girl on this webbed site

US pol, Gaetz 

The weirdest thing to me about this Matt Gaetz thing is the "gaetz showed naked pics of women he slept with on the House floor to colleagues" and LADIES. HAVE SOME STANDARDS. the man looks like Syndrome with shorter, darker hair. Come on.

The sky was on fire last night at work*

*just a beautiful sunset

just remembered on Friday I saw this bumper sticker on a truck and I do not get it at all bc they also had this one

The vet said my fat baby isn't fat anymore and I need to put weight back on him

Me, watching this coach who takes her mask off EVERY TIME she needs to speak

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Unstoppable shitposting engine.