Cara @Marquise_de_carabats@jorts.horse

the original text was ‘you’re being very rude to adolf hitler’ which i sure i don’t have to tell anyone (who’s not actively grinding an axe) is a joke about the liberal preference for civility over reality

anyway i think i’m going to bring back the original profile text. the only person brave enough to address me publicly about it was still cowardly enough to pretend i’d been called a nazi by honest mistake and it was really completely my fault, so fuck ‘em

Whoopsy doodle!

A tiny radioactive capsule that can cause severe illness is missing in Australia - https://www.npr.org/2023/01/31/1152870649/australia-missing-radioactive-capsule

modern problems call for modern solutions

Baby's out here like

'THE MAN* is trying to KEEP ME DOWN**'

*my loving father
**literally feed me the food I need to live

Not to keep BabyPosting(tm) but like, it must feel so unjust to be a baby?

Like "I am hungry and in fact am actively being fed but I also NEED to do the worm RIGHT THIS MINUTE and I don't get why that's such a big PROBLEM???"

And there is no way to explain to them that bottle + thrashing = formula all over outside of baby instead of inside of baby (where it is supposed to go). They just know that now on top of everything else they are WET and it is NOT AGREEABLE.

There was a comic book series from the late 90s that was a sort of dark comedy scifi that made a lot of social and political commentary and there's one part where a character argues with their AI assistant about skipping the emails that are secretly porn ads. "Just show me the real mail! I'll pay you." "I can't lie. I'm being paid to show you the porn."

Anyways I got a new phone and I've been installing games off the Play store.

Packaged, but excited to try this.

fact: child labor is illegal
fact: 100% of cops are babies
conclusion: cops aren’t workers

My cousin took the Pfizer booster shot 3 days ago and now his house is filled with classified documents.

you get some top secret documents! you get some top secret documents! you get some top secret documents! you get some top secret documents!

you ALL get some top secret documents!

5 minutes into Last of Us and had to turn it off, this imagery is too violent... shocking to watch someone do this