@Zero_Democracy oh god that part gave me the creeps

everything he did gave me the creeps but especially that

Technically I'm bisexual, which means I'm only attracted once every other gender, *touches earpiece* ah I'm now being told that I'm "insanely problematic" and should "shut the fuck up", back to you in the studio greg

I'm also mildly creeped out that I can post something on like, tumblr and then my google account knows about it in perpetuity but that's a problem for Future Dubs

(This is a problem for me because I made like 3 joke posts about how norman reedus is my boyfriend and now my phone WILL NOT STOP showing me walking dead spoilers. I swear to god I'm my own worst anime)

I literally never use that sidebar news app for Android but now that I'm "not allowed" to look at it for the next 8 weeks or so the urge to slide over there is almost insurmountable

my wife is watching or listening to something for school and they keep mentioning australia and i keep yelling 'australia's not real' or 'they're lying to you it doesn't exist' and 'australia's fake' and now she's getting mad at me for preaching the truth to her

The fact that I've never asked for money on here says less about my financial situation and more about my ability to shoplift

@Los_Ingobernables_De_Jorts good take, much more nuanced than my "look modern jam jazz sucks shit, no I will not elaborate"

I love all the crime documentaries that are like "ahhh yes, nobody suspected him, because he was super hot" and then the serial killer comes out and he looks like a thumb that lost a fight with an industrial baler

It was 8 years ago and I was driving back from an industrial festival that @Luxotek told me not to go to about 30 times

Post your favorite Valentine's Day memory, mine is the time I accidentally set a trashcan on fire outside of a BP station in Central Florida

Roses are red
Red are the roses
roses roses roses
𝚁𝙾𝚂𝙴𝚂 𝚁𝙾𝚂𝙴𝚂 𝚁𝙾𝚂𝙴𝚂
𝚁͝𝙾҆𝚂҃𝙴̲𝚂͛ ͗𝚁߰𝙾҈𝚂ͮ𝙴̃𝚂̯ ̷𝚁̎𝙾̃𝚂̪𝙴҉𝚂̾
𝚁̷̛̫̉𝙾̠͖ͨ᷁́̕𝚂͆ͣ𝙴߮͊̂͒̊𝚂҅͏߳̂͗ ゙͔̪̐̏𝚁̬̬̜̐𝙾̙͖͎᷅𝚂̢͗𝙴̬̫ͫ̾᷆𝚂͚̈́̊ ߫̌҃͜𝚁̘͚̌𝙾̸̭͓̓͒ͅ𝚂͖߮߰𝙴̢̼̾𝚂̩͋̀͡
̭ͨ̓߯͒҇͊᷇͛҄͝𝚁゙̡̫͚̲̹̜ͣ̀ͫ̂̉̋͆ͧ͡͝𝙾̲̯҄ͪ͆͊̌͋̚𝚂̛̩̣̩̯͖̮҄ͦ̔߮߯ͯ̃̄߳҃ͣ߭̃͝ͅ𝙴゙͉̪͍᷀ͦͭ͛᷇᷈́𝚂̬̲҄ͩ̊͞ ̸̢̛̘͖͉̟̠̟̋᷁̌ͤ̃᷇߳᷀̇᷆߬ͣ́߰͠𝚁᷀͆̚͝͏̧̳͇̝̤ͥ̍߬͛߳̌ͨ𝙾̮᷉̃̚͏゙ͬͦ́𝚂̶̷̧̟̰͓߰߰͗ͮ̊͆̓߮ͫ̋̌᷄᷆҇͒͜𝙴̑҉𝚂̣̭̣͇̜̋̌̂ͨͭ̑͑̑߬᷆ͨ͟ ̰̤́᷈᷅͠҈ͣ͏̭͖̜̙͖̘̀߬߭ͬ҄̓߫𝚁̬̣͈̞͗̂ͦ̓҅ͩ͛߰̽҉҆̔߯͠𝙾゙̜̘̝҃᷄̍͜𝚂͙̰̲͚̼̠̤҆ͣͮ̈̈́̎᷁߳͘͡𝙴̺͍̣ͣ᷆̈̓ͥ͝͠𝚂̛̠̝̀̏͋͗ͮͪ߫͐͆̈́

If you'd told me back in my teens that there'd be a kids cartoon about lesbian space rocks I would have thought you were fuckin high

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jorts.horse

Unstoppable shitposting engine.