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a solid 80% of spa services I see offered are bullshit like this, if you're not getting injected with weird plant toxins or shot up with lasers it's fake. your money is going down a toilet.

It will never stop being funny to me that a spa will just fuckin shave your face for $200 and call it "dermaplaning"

what a great scam

fediverse: come for the decentralized twitter clone, stay for the people who helped you realize you're a girl

bofa lol tried to touch my weiner recommend blocking them

trying to watch The Terror and my freaking cat is SNORING in my ear

I can't believe self agency has been missing for 37 years

still pissed that the bad Crash won three Academy Awards and the good Crash got booed off the stage at Cannes

I have shitty knees how the fuck am I expected to have a Blood Feud every ten minutes. Get outta here.

Seriously though I'm actually 35 and I literally cannot imagine finding the energy to be unchill. I get winded looking at a piece of cake, how the fuck are people even finding the time

*torrents of diarrhea spraying out of my business end* I'm an adult

being personally threatened by several dozen mastodon instance admins because i tootred that i was,, "Hornt for lasagana", on jorts dot Horse, whcih they've now ""blocked""

fukc you, fuck you, i will never surrender, it's a legitimate medical condition,, eat my ass,

it's incredibly problematic that people keep befriending this young person, who I spy on constantly for some reason

How dare you point out that I am constantly shitting on the floor. I'm not shitting on the floor, and if I am, it is because I am Very Important. How DARE u

Peaky Blinders working real fuckin hard at making me hate Nick Cave

God damn y’all really talmbout some shit called “Australia” 😂😂😂 like foh with that made up harry potter shit bruh🤓. Like y’all really out here on some upside down ass shit🙄🙃😤. Muhfuckers really like “ayo check out this giant ass rabbit with a whole purse on its ass” smdh. 😩😩Like “check out this poisonous duck bruh.” Childish.

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jorts.horse

Unstoppable shitposting engine.