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a solid 80% of spa services I see offered are bullshit like this, if you're not getting injected with weird plant toxins or shot up with lasers it's fake. your money is going down a toilet.

It will never stop being funny to me that a spa will just fuckin shave your face for $200 and call it "dermaplaning"

what a great scam

fediverse: come for the decentralized twitter clone, stay for the people who helped you realize you're a girl

bofa lol tried to touch my weiner recommend blocking them

Happy New Years From the Marxist Reading Group of Glasgow

trying to watch The Terror and my freaking cat is SNORING in my ear

I can't believe self agency has been missing for 37 years

still pissed that the bad Crash won three Academy Awards and the good Crash got booed off the stage at Cannes

I have shitty knees how the fuck am I expected to have a Blood Feud every ten minutes. Get outta here.

Seriously though I'm actually 35 and I literally cannot imagine finding the energy to be unchill. I get winded looking at a piece of cake, how the fuck are people even finding the time

*torrents of diarrhea spraying out of my business end* I'm an adult

being personally threatened by several dozen mastodon instance admins because i tootred that i was,, "Hornt for lasagana", on jorts dot Horse, whcih they've now ""blocked""

fukc you, fuck you, i will never surrender, it's a legitimate medical condition,, eat my ass,

it's incredibly problematic that people keep befriending this young person, who I spy on constantly for some reason

How dare you point out that I am constantly shitting on the floor. I'm not shitting on the floor, and if I am, it is because I am Very Important. How DARE u

Peaky Blinders working real fuckin hard at making me hate Nick Cave

God damn y’all really talmbout some shit called “Australia” 😂😂😂 like foh with that made up harry potter shit bruh🤓. Like y’all really out here on some upside down ass shit🙄🙃😤. Muhfuckers really like “ayo check out this giant ass rabbit with a whole purse on its ass” smdh. 😩😩Like “check out this poisonous duck bruh.” Childish.

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jorts.horse

Unstoppable shitposting engine.