and now back to your regularly scheduled barely working website -- this has been our yearly scheduled outage due to me being a disastrously uncoordinated fuckup that forgets to renew the domain name every. single. year. happy jortsmas everybody!! :gynecologist:

@bracara i just need to figure out how to install glitch without docker, i know its possible cuz jorts used to be on docker and i nuked it and moved off of docker when we upped to v3.3

or maybe bully someone into basically doing it for me

we'll see

@eris :sob_blood: the 𝔾𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕥 𝔽𝕠𝕖 has appeared before me once again.... docker....... my Enemy....... :sob_blood:

glitch.soc's latest release is from 2017? that doesn't seem right. let me see...

oh. they're using "packages" instead of releases now. okay, sure, what's a github package?

oh. oh, no. oh no no no no no. not this. anything but this. NO.


:emergency: jorts dot horse upgrade path [FORK INFO] :emergency: 

@waitworry that's perfectly fine, i mostly posted the poll for a vibe check anyway

:emergency: jorts dot horse upgrade path :emergency: 

@killeveryhetero ok, but jorts' poor preformance has really helped me reconnect with my family

:emergency: jorts dot horse upgrade path [FORK INFO] :emergency: 

oh, for those with no prior knowledge of hometown and glitch.soc:


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:emergency: jorts dot horse upgrade path WITH POLL! :emergency: 

@ruxbat there's a patreon, yeah! server costs are like 50ish per month i think, that may change up or down later when we presumably end up having to move off of linode when updating the software doesn't solve the problem

please don't feel obligated or anything because the server costs are already more than covered by the patreon, but it's:

:emergency: jorts dot horse upgrade path WITH POLL! :emergency: 

so let's get on with step one! but vanilla masto... stinky. oof. no thank you

so, here's a poll! from talking to folks a while back, hometown and glitch.soc seemed like the best fits -- they give us more features, they don't look like stinky modern masto, and they both include the ability to do local-only posting, something i think we all want

i do not promise to abide by the results of this poll, but make your thoughts known here!

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:emergency: jorts dot horse upgrade path :emergency: 

so i figure...

step one: update jorts
step two: declare the problem solved and ignore it for another month
step three: admit the problem is not solved, ignore it for another few weeks
step four: move us to another webserver or whatever the fuck needs to be done to fix this shit


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:emergency: jorts dot horse upgrade path :emergency: 

to be blunt, i don't think updating will fix the problem

i think the problem is that linode is now a pile of horseshit for some reason, probably because they got bought

this diagnosis is brought to you by: vibes

but i'm not going to migrate us onto another webserver or anything like that while we're still running cryptkeeper ass cobwebbed shitcode limping along

and i'm *certainly* not gonna do both of these things at once, because i am lazy

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:emergency: jorts dot horse upgrade path :emergency: 

hey lets just say it: jorts runs like dogshit nowadays, and any of the minor tweaks i've tried to do to fix it have done absolutely nothing

it's my own website, and even i can't get it to load on my phone at all anymore


so, the thing i've been putting off for weeks now (and don't get me wrong ... i will probably put off for a couple more weeks after this post! that's BRAND CONSISTENCY, baby!) is upon us

we need to update

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Unstoppable shitposting engine.