Zoey - Amazon FC Ambassador 📦 @killeveryhetero@jorts.horse

@Luxotek he's already eating shit directly out of the ass of john mccain in hell right now

DAVID KOCH IS STILL SUPER DEAD RIGHT NOW LOL

JUST IN CASE YOU FORGOT

HEY GUYS

*a large box with a crank sticking out of it stands before you. as you turn the crank, music plays...*

🎶 DA NA, DA NA, DA NA NA DA NA, DA NA, DA NA, DA NAAAAA NA, DA NA, DA NA, DA NA NA DA NA, *POP*! DAVID KOCH IS DEAD 🎶

@red fuck

Bullet For My Valentine (If My Valentine Was David Koch)

imagine a giant, burning, lake of piss, stretching on as far as the eye can pee

david koch is currently swimming across it with his mouth open like a large human vacuum cleaner for piss

🦀🦀🦀🦀 HELLLLLL YEAH DAVID KOCH IS CURRENTLY CHUGGING PISS IN HELL, YOU LOVE TO SEE IT FOLKS 🦀🦀🦀🦀

i will never be Cancelled, because all of my opinions and takes are good and correct

no thank you, i will not be accepting replies to this ted talk,

the chicken was good tho

@mood it's bullshit tbh

back in 2014 my hormones were out of whack for a variety of reasons and i basically went through a permanent hot flash for about 3 months

it's literally like you have a mid-tier CPU with a $3 heatsink installed without any thermal paste and things are okay until someone tries to launch minecraft or opens youtube at which point everything immediately goes to hell

tfw 25 minutes later of sitting indoors in AC and going through several rounds of splashing cold water on your face, drinking a cold drink, and fanning yourself, and it only sorta helps because some dipshit forgot to install a heatsink when they assembled your idiot body,

()

tfw its 34 degrees (C) outside and your body doesn't correctly regulate heat (think a CPU missing a heatsink) but you really want chicken from that place 15 minutes down the road so you go for it anyway and now you might die

()

@Luxotek i don't have any duffel bags tho