manic pixie fever dream @killeveryhetero@jorts.horse
Admin
☭⚢☭ useless lesbian ＊ certified nuclear waste technician ＊ insane cat hag ＊ anarcho-communist scum ＊ power abusing trash admin ＊ very spooky ☭⚢☭
Joined Oct 2018
manic pixie fever dream
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Have you ever heard the tragedy of Sir Lancelot the guy with the unusually large hog? I thought not. It's not a story that mastodon.social would tell you. It's a jorts.horse legend.
manic pixie fever dream
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Sir Lancelot has lots of sex due to being a total badass and also his unusually large hog and all the other knights mock him relentlessly for it, refusing to refer to him by his real name and instead using derisive nicknames like "Sir Fucksalot" and "that guy with the unusually large hog"
manic pixie fever dream
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you'll never get away with this, FARTSNIFFINGMAN!
OH, but I ALREADY HAVE!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *sniiiiiiiiiiiff*
manic pixie fever dream
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ABSOLUTELY CURSED, DO NOT CLICK, DO NOT READ, DO NOT LOOK AT, DONT!!!!!!!!!! [bepis]
herwe at ARby's™ we know to take the holidsdays SERIOUSLY
so to Prepare fyourself for this special Valentaiones day, why not try something NEW to SPICE things UP for your lovers? check out these Hot and SPicy Tips, gathedrd hrere by a Local Expert! /
Tip #1:
manic pixie fever dream
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🎶 the best, part, of waking up,,
is pooping from your butt 🎵
manic pixie fever dream
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please help, my family is threatening to disown me for dabbing aggressively at family dinners, what can i do to regain their trust and respect??? 
manic pixie fever dream
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𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬 𝘮𝘺 𝘸𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘴𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘦,
𝙄𝙏 𝙋𝙐𝙎𝙃 𝙔𝙊𝙐 𝘽𝘼𝘾𝙆𝙒𝘼𝙍𝘿.
𝑺𝑬𝑬 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑺𝑷𝑨𝑪𝑬 𝑪𝑼𝑪𝑲...
@Luxotek does this image of kevin smith in huge jorts help at all?
zucc's kink
@radicalrobit dead eyes, dead bepis -- he's completely flaccid during the entire event
zucc's kink
@radicalrobit i'm personally of the opinion that zucc's kink is staring, dead-eyed, full eye contact with himself in front a full-length mirror, fully nude, just absolutely going to town on himself for hours, completely silently
@radicalrobit don't kinkshame the zucc
moderation request
@moiety depends on the situation, but, yeah, sometimes. not the one i'm vagueposting about, though
people need to learn that the block function exists for a reason instead of pissing themselves every time two people are rude to eachother in a thread
@Luxotek i'm gonna kiss 'em
when another instance demands to know what jorts is "going to do" about a user that was in a fedi slapfight with some other user:
the charisma carpenter / joss whedon thing makes SO much sense if you watched season 4/5 of Angel.... cordelia's plotline never made any fucking sense within the context of the show, it just... blew up, and the way it happened always felt weird and mean.
SURPRISE! that's exactly what it was. what a loser
@Gargron hm
currently rethinking my position on frogs
controversial opinion
frogs are neat
@Luxotek oh christ can you imagine
if i ever want everyone to immediately get off my server, this would be the funniest way to do it
Admin
☭⚢☭ useless lesbian ＊ certified nuclear waste technician ＊ insane cat hag ＊ anarcho-communist scum ＊ power abusing trash admin ＊ very spooky ☭⚢☭
Joined Oct 2018
