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there is, however, a parallel conflict in this office

one that has been going on for literal years

between my father, and an unknown antagonist

The Great Horse War is still stuck in a cease-fire since the Camel Nation halted all hostilities

this displeases me

@killeveryhetero this energy drink livetoot thread has been the sleeper drama of the morning.

the warmer it gets as i reluctantly drink it, slowly, the worse it becomes


nobody asked this but i'm drinking a ROCKSTAR PUNCHED and it's,


real bad,,

perhaps sensing danger via primitive instincts, the noble flagbelter fucked right back off to his natural environment, hopefully to never be heard from again. what a truly fascinating and terrible creature



you read this in david attenborough's voice




it is absolutely infuriating when american-flag-belt-coworker cuts my replies out of email chains

Important Email comes in, dickhead is unfortunately on the chain. I reply immediately, sometimes with in-depth context or information. 10-15 minutes later, Asshole McFlagsocks replies to the original email, ignoring my reply, and the email chain inevitably sticks with his fork.

it's such a minor grievance but it's constant and i'd really like an opportunity to set him on fire

i've been doing this for several years and the takeaway i want y'all to get from this is that i'm actually starting to get good at drawing that godsdamned fist

there is only one way to justify eating the delicious food at a restaurant run by garbage dogtrash men who force all of the waitresses to wear miniskirts

good morning to everyone except for the vile, fetid beasts who hoversquat over the toilet seat to try and avoid touching it and proceed to piss all over the fucking thing

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Unstoppable shitposting engine.