Show more

what the fuck there's a glinner instance now??? for real? lmao that's hysterical

jorts folks only, should we:

• block the domain?
or
• mess with him until he posts a hilarious screed about how he's been victimized?

Last night, @killeveryhetero worked late into the night, with support from @Luxotek, to make sure we could continue to enjoy our shitposting. This is how it went down, I assume:

our server infrastructure is scaled pretty far above our needs, so once i do some work making things prettier and jortsier we may begin a RECRUITMENT CAMPAIGN again in earnest

i need to double-check that mailgun is actually working, first, cuz prior to this update several folks weren't getting mail and who knows where that was breaking down

🚨 JORTS DOT HORSE IS FULLY OPERATIONAL AGAIN BABEYYYYYY 🚨

media is fixed, imagemagick wasn't fucking installed

streaming is fixed, i think it was just overwhelmed by the backlog workers (let me know if streaming is not fixed for you)

we're missing a few of the old jorts customizations (joot, our :angry_laugh: favicon) which i'll re-introduce later now that we're actually working correctly

:jhorse: REJOICE, YE FAITHFUL, AND DO HORSE CRIMES :jhorse:

(can't wake up) WAKE ME UP INSIDE

@killeveryhetero

that's what you get for being a corporate shill - proper grammar and typing from habit will be your ultimate downfall

I FIXED THE DISCORD BOT APPARENTLY CAPITALIZATION MATTERS FOR THE BOT SERVICE NAME wow fuck my life ANYWAY WE'RE ALL GREEN except media fuck media

THE GOOD NEWS IS THAT EVERYTHING PROPERLY BOOTS UP AFTER A RESTART WITHOUT MY INPUT

except my discord bot for some reason

BUT THATS LESS IMPORTANT

trying to save my best shitposts for when jorts.horse comes back up but i'm not sure i'll remember them in an hour let alone all the way to 2024

it's the year 2037:

the super powers have all fallen

the united states of amazon has Always been at war with the federated states of BP

the UK finally almost has a deal worked out for brexit

russia is a suburb of india

flying cars were a short lived fad and only still used by gen x

james cameron just released titanic 5

and jorts.horse finally updates to mastodon v3.0.1

it wouldn't be jorts.horse unless half of it was broken - so true to form.. it's broken

FUCKIN WOOPS

rebooting to see if every properly starts itself after a reboot brb

i was gonna upload a screenshot of our backlog being at 0 but right yeah i forgot media doesnt work

BACKLOG IS AT 0 BABEYYYYY

if we're having any federating problems we can't blame it on the backlog anymore

YEE, and i cannot stress this enough, HAW

🚨 WE BACK BABEYYYYYYY 🚨

media is schrodinger's catfucked -- we seem to *have* old media, but we can't *upload* media, or pick up new media. i don't fuckin know. i've been at this for 9 hours.

streaming is inconsistent... home and federated appear to be streaming for the most part, local doesn't want to. leave it alone, it needs a break, it's tired

web is good!

some of our customizations are missing until i re-do them, who cares, it's better than being on our old janky shit code

:blobdab:

Show more
jorts.horse

Unstoppable shitposting engine.