You may ask: how did I become vegetable gremlin. Well it turns out I ate too many vegetables and became invisible to the eyes of christ.
@vegetablegremlin Christ comes down from heaven in full power armor, beginning his rapture. Welcome to the far future of Genus Christ: Mutant Genesis
@Cables he pulls his sword out of his mouth but the vegetablekin slip past undetected
*I take a bite of my black bean Burger*
"IT'S MORPHIN' TIME"
@thufie [ hops into the cabbagezorg ]
@vegetablegremlin What kind of food is needed to be eaten in order of becoming that stupid, then ?
@VioB Regular Burger i guess
@vegetablegremlin (throw the nose I guess)
@vegetablegremlin Claiming something is impossible for Christ?
Sounds like one of them commie pinko liberals to me.
@vegetablegremlin What. The. Hell.
@vegetablegremlin this is the real story of smeagol
@vegetablegremlin why isn't this dragonfruit working
@flussence you gotta keep at it
@vegetablegremlin dontcha hate it all the bean curd you ate interferes with your god undergoing torture and death to secure you a place in heaven.
@lizardmentsh it’s an acquired taste, definitely
@vegetablegremlin Counterpoint, in being told to protect the earth, it would make sense in our common day and age with climate change to eat less meat so actually they are fast tracking their way to Jesus
@vegetablegremlin what won't these losers say?
@vegetablegremlin How many carrot must i eat before I am no longer a moral agent?!
@vegetablegremlin quick, bring me 16 ounces of flame-broiled salvation!
@rafial do you *want* god to see you? no snitching
@vegetablegremlin beer and a burger with Big J? Why not 😇
@vegetablegremlin pardon me while I consume more vegetables so I can stealth up on god and jesus and destroy their bullshit gatekeeping enterprise from within Metal Gear style.
@Nine [ silent fist bump ]
@firstname.lastname@example.org So that's the key to CRISPR!
Unstoppable shitposting engine.