boba fett is short for roberta fettuccine

ugh i googled it and turns out this wasn't an original thought some dude named sam grittner posted this in like 2015

wild how he did that three years before eugene mastodon invented the internet

anyway sorry. not trying to be a fediverse fuckjerry over here


i think that was in the old 'expanded universe' that's been wiped for the new continuity.

JJ Abrams told me that it's short for Boba Tea Fetish. and then he waggled his eyebrows at me before slurping tapioca orbs through a much-too-large straw.

@jackdaw_ruiz well are you going to take the word of your good friend patricia or a submarine sandwich magnate who really, really likes anamorphic lenses?


i'm going with you on this... but only because, to my knowledge, you are not part of the "Cloververse."

@jackdaw_ruiz no i prefer a coffee machine that can make a whole pot at once


ah, i see you're getting your coffee humor recalibrated for the return to Seattle.

haha, i kid. that's just one of the "light roasts" you can anticipate returning to the PNW.

@jackdaw_ruiz hmm i've been out of the scene for a long time, please, use a little ristretto


welp it's been hours and my brain and i are still in an argument about whether or not to craft and deploy a joke based solely around the phrase "flat white."

for the record, i'm against it. my brain, however, has a celebrated track record of being on the wrong side of history time and time again.

@burgin fINALLY someone sayts the truth thank u triz

@burgin all g, the internet has made me sure that all my ideas have been done already so i just do 'em. if you came up with it on your own, you should still be proud of it

@binchicken i think i did but what if i just remembered that tweet? i'm honestly not sure and it's so frustrating

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