manic pixie fever dream @killeveryhetero@jorts.horse

BuzzFeed's Top Ten Tips for Honking Off in a Crowded Arby's™ Without Getting Caught by the Fukcing Cops

Well HOT DAMN folks it's that time of year again and I know you're all gathering the family and heading down to the local Arby's™ but before you go, take a gander at this Hot Tips gathered by local experts:

1) Don't forget the sunscreen!
[ᴄʟɪᴄᴋ ᴛᴏ ʀᴇᴀᴅ ᴍᴏʀᴇ...]

Promoted

i'm very drunk, also hello,

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Ah, noble sword-head-guy, i knew him well,

ehehehe

i'm off the train!! just kidding we got on another train #trainshopsaturday

still on a train y'all

just woke up on a train

still chonkin' along

dear lord my spine is an mc escher painting

honk honk 😜 make way for the train

#trainshopsaturday

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the table behind us: "ah yes here we have the land and surf combo, medium well, and another of the same, also medium well. and over here you've got the steak, well done. enjoy folks!"

the table over one from us is animatedly explaining "yes, yes, well done -- just make sure there's NO PINK in the middle."

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU ALL

#trainshopfriday

still on a train

train dinner time

THREE PEOPLE AROUND ME just ordered WELL DONE STEAKS

i am surrounded by accursed fiends

#trainshopfriday

train train train train train

#trainshopfriday

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i'm on a train

i'm gonna be on this train for the next 30 hours

#trainshopfriday

@rigatonimonster @LuigiEsq

yes i know you deleted the post I WON'T BACK DOWN

@rigatonimonster @LuigiEsq

you're ​​ sis for using the emojis wrong

these jackasses are still texting eachother pictures of their trucks

things that have conspired to keep me awake all night:

the cats having a dance party

three severe weather alerts at various times of the night

lightning smashing a parking lot nearby and setting off a dozen car alarms, twice

the cats having a fight club

our bedroom ceiling leaking because of this fuckoff storm, drip, drip , dripdrip, on a loud pillow

my idiot shitheel coworkers in a group text at 9 in the morning talking about their cars getting flooded GO BACK TO SLEEP TROY

this is funnier every time i look at it

i spent like 15 minutes in bed last night just giggling uncontrollably because of it

okay i'm no longer an anime villain

well,

sort of,,

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halfway through getting my hair done, i look like an anime villain lmao

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