attractive nuisance @killeveryhetero@jorts.horse

@ancient_catbus PLEASE ENJOY THIS CERTIFIED HOOD CLASSIC

IT WILL TAKE ME ONE THOUSAND YEARS TO UPLOAD ON MY SHITTY WEBSITE

BuzzFeed's Top Ten Tips for Honking Off in a Crowded Arby's™ Without Getting Caught by the Fukcing Cops

Well HOT DAMN folks it's that time of year again and I know you're all gathering the family and heading down to the local Arby's™ but before you go, take a gander at this Hot Tips gathered by local experts:

1) Don't forget the sunscreen!
[ᴄʟɪᴄᴋ ᴛᴏ ʀᴇᴀᴅ ᴍᴏʀᴇ...]

Promoted

amy's got some hot girl vibes tho for real, laying in bed just chugging coffee while doomscrolling that's based as hell

i hate my company so fucking much on every possible level it's unreal

oh my god

i'm only a couple of episodes in and i don't actually want anyone to give me the answer in advance, but --

if gundam witch from mercury is queerbaiting me i'm going to scream incoherently about it for years

generations of youths will hear my screeching, for decades, and roll their eyes like "there goes granny, screaming about mecha robots or some shit again, what an absolute loser" and i will merely hiss and snarl at them in response

there's only one gender that i know of, pardner. the 𝘩𝘶𝘮𝘢𝘯 gender.

you see, the joke here is that you were expecting an absurd punchline, but instead, it's just his fetish and he's requesting that you indulge him in it. in this case, the humor is derived from the subversion of your expectations -- you expected the absurd, but were presented with the mundane, and by the nature of your expectations the mundane has become absurd. in this TED talk i will attempt to

WELL SLAP MY ASS AND CALL ME SALLY CUZ THAT'S MY FETISH

anyone remember pissing? #throwbackthursday