Zoey - Arby's™ Ambassador 🥡 @killeveryhetero@jorts.horse

BuzzFeed's Top Ten Tips for Honking Off in a Crowded Arby's™ Without Getting Caught by the Fukcing Cops

Well HOT DAMN folks it's that time of year again and I know you're all gathering the family and heading down to the local Arby's™ but before you go, take a gander at this Hot Tips gathered by local experts:

1) Don't forget the sunscreen!
[ᴄʟɪᴄᴋ ᴛᴏ ʀᴇᴀᴅ ᴍᴏʀᴇ...]

Promoted

anyone remember a meme where "you come to a fork in the road" or something and there's a sphynx with either ron paul or rand paul's face on it asking you to solve riddles? i swear i didn't make this up but no combination of search terms is finding it

y'all remember bofa? damn what was that like 20 years ago

kim jong unf send toot

i miss horseday 🐎

.......we have several pages of this. I really dunno what's going on here -- they've all got similar vaguely-japanese sounding usernames, algorithmic display names of "real names", and random avis presumably generated randomly from imgur or google images.

we've temporarily disabled sign-ups to jorts.horse to stop whatever script is creating hundreds of these accounts for no discernable reason. you can still invite users if you need/want to.

they made another one

stop that

god knows why someone made 20 bot accounts last night but they're all banned now

thinkin about frogs

me every tuesday

my company told everyone to work from home because of boomerflu and american flag belt dipshit coworker is proudly working from the office and making smug comments in email chains about how he's the only one to go into the office this week

no one is discussing the horse incident

i dunno if i just missed the discussion or if he quietly put it away, the only thing they're hollering about is the Boomer Flu

i am disappoint

it's fine, it's fine -- i've spent the time making a rough draft of the next page, feel free to spoiler yourself by taking a look, or leave the media hidden so things are still fresh when it happens!!

there's no fucking way THIS one won't trigger at least a heated debate though

BACK AT MY DESK AND LISTENING INTENTLY

THE PAYLOAD IS MIA

i'm sorry but i'm gonna miss his initial reaction to it because i'm leaving for lunch early to avoid suspicion (had a very narrow window to get this up)

🚨 YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE 🚨

and i cannot stress this enough,

🚨 HAAAWWWWWWWW 🚨

TARGET SPOTTED

I REPEAT, TARGET SPOTTED

#OPERATIONHORSEDAY IS BACK IN ACTION, FOLKS

PLEASE STAND BY

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