manic pixie fever dream @killeveryhetero@jorts.horse

BuzzFeed's Top Ten Tips for Honking Off in a Crowded Arby's™ Without Getting Caught by the Fukcing Cops

Well HOT DAMN folks it's that time of year again and I know you're all gathering the family and heading down to the local Arby's™ but before you go, take a gander at this Hot Tips gathered by local experts:

1) Don't forget the sunscreen!
[ᴄʟɪᴄᴋ ᴛᴏ ʀᴇᴀᴅ ᴍᴏʀᴇ...]

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now masto is only eating 2 GB of my RAM instead of fucking 7.9 GB lol

hey alright it came back on its own thank god i don't have to do anything

yeah i'm gonna reboot lol

sorry if jorts.horse breaks in the reboot i'm like 90% sure it's config'd to boot back up automagically when the server restarts but

i should probly reboot huh

a few early reports from historically trustworthy sources that Elon Musk actually purchased twitter as a dowry at the behest of his new fiance, Graham Lineham; apparently, the two quietly became engaged last month, after reportedly bonding over being publicly cucked by transwomen

beware the raw power of grandma's inexplicable Blowjob Angel

getting scattered reports here at the newsdesk that known Mafia snitch, Elon "The Muskrat" Paglione, may have been behind the recent Twitter Inc. acquisition and money laundering scheme.

When reached for comment, he responded: "I buya the website, i no paya my taxes. Mama Mia!"

jorts still costs me $50 a month btw lol

i'm gonna have to update this stupid website again huh

bots get out

important jorts dot horse server info

eyyyyy i remembered to renew the domain name with 3 days to spare

catte