Dracula Sex Tape @dubsteppenwolf@jorts.horse

Johny Johny

yes papa

summoning the ancients

no papa

telling lies

no papa

what's that behind you

H̵̡̡̥̥̰̣̝̱͉̳̻͇̱̀ͅẢ̶̡̝̫̺̮̟̖̥̣̻̭͔͔̈́̍͊͑̿͛̈́̈́̿͛͘͘ ̵̲̮͖̟̩̰̲̝̹̹̗̿͐̎̉̇͗͋̎̋̒̀́̈́͜H̴̪̟͔̟̉́̒͌̎̅͛̌̀̕̚Ǎ̴̖̠͂̒̀̅͊̌͋̈́͐͝ ̷̨̘̬̠̥̺͕̂̇͒̚͝͝H̷̦̞̠̮͊̓́̽̀Ą̴̢̱͖̖͖̲͇̮̪͋͆̓

Me whenever anyone does anything

*to the tune of Damn It Feels Good To Be a Gangsta by the Getto Boys*

damn it feels good to be a gamer

*everyone starts yelling at me*

Who's fucking idea was it to put the waking sands there. Someone will ANSWER for this

Hello I'm playing the final fantasy mmo and I have some THOUGHTS

I want to own the Meat Dress. I want to wear it every day like it's a Star Trek uniform. Everybody will see me and say "there goes that dumb bitch in the meat dress"

Fuckin... look at it. It rules.

Guess who bought light up sneakers for children

There should be a David Attenborough ocean show but ONLY the weird glowing shrimps at the bottom of the seafloor. Not a one hour special either I want 7 seasons of that shit

I can't explain it good

Zoey's got me watching something called Psychopass??? Anyway we're spending most of our time yelling at the screen about "touching weiners with Jeff", which is the plot of the show, to us

If anyone's wondering how I'm doing the answer is "dying of shitty back-itis" ok thanks

Dracula Sex Tape

don't try to film
in a mirror,

dick won't appear

I'm rewatching season 7 and this time I'm actually watching all the "behind the scenes" extra stuff in the HBO app and these guys keep going "yeah we really wrote ourselves into a hole here lmao, we basically have no idea what we're doing"

Guess I gotta decide if I'm going to save up all the Throne Games and watch them 8 weeks from now or start tonight and trust my shitty brain to follow the plot one week at a time

Hellbent is really out here claiming to be the "first gay slasher" like we've never seen Nightmare on Elm Street 2

Hi I've had "Dracula Sex Tape" to the tune of Eleanor Rigby stuck in my head for forty minutes. How's everybody doing.