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Pinned toot

*to the tune of Damn It Feels Good To Be a Gangsta by the Getto Boys*

damn it feels good to be a gamer

*everyone starts yelling at me*

Snoop Doug boosted
Snoop Doug boosted

The cast is great and I like the premise quite a lot so I'm dying to see how they managed to fuck this up badly enough to hit like 15% on RT

Welp I'm going to bed but please join me tomorrow when I live-toot some absolutely hot garbage called Air, the only sci-fi from 2015 that managed to be so bad that I wasn't even aware it existed until just now

I have Some Thoughts about this new imdb channel which are mainly "ads are incorrectly placed" and "too many goddamn ads" and "why is this the only place to watch Adaptation"

Showing up at the blood bank once a month to ask for a refill

anyway I didn't read The Article so as usual I'm talking out of my entire ass

Nothing has ever or will ever capture the dread of the bayou as accurately and effectively as the first season of True Detective, do not @ me

Sometimes I like to fly all the way to Argentina, declare myself an expert on the culture after living there for like 3 weeks, and then write a bunch of shitty medium articles where I get mad that they're all talking about something called "soccer" instead of american football

Anyway I'm watching Sharp Objects and by "watching" I mean "staring in the general direction of the tv while my eyes glaze over from pain and kinda halfway following the plot"

Blumhouse is like 70% unbridled genius and 30% heinous dogshit. Maybe 60/40. Half and half.

Snoop Doug boosted

ME: i am so epic and badass eating lunch by myself. i am like a lone wolf, finding my way without a pack. society could never appreciate a genius of my caliber

EVERYONE ELSE: why is that girl sitting alone at a park bench cracking peanuts and only eating the shells

Snoop Doug boosted

For the past several months, I've been sending american-flag-belt-coworker almost-weekly network messages through an app he logs into that I have full admin on. The message pops up in the bottom corner of your desktop, and gives no appearance of having anything to do with the app it's coming from.

For the first few months, he only received this message, over and over:

Snoop Doug boosted

sorry everyone, i'm about to be banned! i DMed Eugen the word "asstodon" and he said he's gonna delete my account once he gets out of the hospital

Snoop Doug boosted

I'm rereading this toot and it feels like a bot wrote it after being fed thousands of hours of my Content(tm)

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Unstoppable shitposting engine.