Pinned toot
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽  
1+
Pinned toot
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽  

join my terrible discord server

discord.gg/AB2jKM

-18+ only

-no lewding

-everybody is a mod

-nothing matters

1
Pinned toot
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽  
1+
Pinned toot
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽  
1
Pinned toot
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽  

after many moons and much traveling I have arrived at the forbidden city the strange fortune teller told me about. I look around, but something is wrong - where I expected iron eagles and aryan jawlines instead I see the red standard and horses in jorts. the color drains from my face and I let loose a blood curdling scream "where are my conservatives at?" I fall to the ground and yell at a uncaring sky "represent bros!"

but there are no bros to represent. I hear footsteps & my vision goes dark

1+
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽 boosted
Merry Lynnesmas  

some nerd: you can kill me, but ideas will never die!
me, putting capitalism into a guillotine: what

1+
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽  

drugs Show more

0
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽 boosted
not a man  

@hasya23 *eyes popping out of my head, tongue lapping down to the floor like an old curtain* i literally love making people's lives worse to make my own life seem slightly less hollow

0
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽  

*wolf whistle* hey baby wanna engage in sexual activity? me neither i just wanted to reinforce internalized values propagated by the cisheteropatriarchy!!!!!

1
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽  

well she's all you'd ever want
she's the kind they'd like to flaunt and take to dinner
well she always knows her place
she's got style, she's got grace, most of all she cannot breathe in space
she's a lady. whoa whoa whoa, she's a lady

0
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽 boosted
JD☭Brown  

the dude has the best response to a landlord asking for rent, “far out” and drinking a cocktail with no clue as to what they’re talking about

1
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽  

when someone tells you another platform is better than mastodon

1
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽 boosted
vV The Adaptable Vv  

Hey my name is Bronya and I'm an edgy teen. I'm going to say a slur now.

0
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽 boosted
Laser 🔫  

*Bernie Sanders voice*

Naruto run...to the polls!

1
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽 boosted
:sparkles_kirby: :foxgrin: :sparkles_bi:  

*scrolls through list of skateboard tricks*

nice of someone to compile this list of rad as fuck genders

1
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽 boosted
fem-id'd nipple haver :vf:  

meanwhile, on reddit, the straights are definitely ah, they're not doing so hot

1+
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽 boosted
kew  

in this house, we stan an anarchist queen

1
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽 boosted
Phoenix  
HEY GAMERS, ANYONE WANT SOME GAMER SHOES????!??!?

Why the FUCK is this a thing
K-Swiss's new line of performance sneakers for videogaming https://boingboing.net/2018/12/14/k-swisss-new-line-of-perform.html
1+
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽 boosted
JD☭Brown  

@hasya23 oh good

0
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽  

this taste on the wind, could it be? yes..rich with iron and salt.

someone is using comic sans.

0
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽  

no joke, the first and only time I played D&D our DM insisted on using nipple clamps in the campaign

1
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽  
1
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽 boosted
Meph̕is̶toph̡ęl̷e͝s  
0
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽 boosted
𝖘𝖒𝖆𝖑𝖑 𝖙𝖔𝖜𝖓 𝖜𝖎𝖙𝖈𝖍  

friendly reminder to those of you who may be interested:
spearmint tea has been shown to lower testosterone

1+
72% sub-saharan african💀🌽 boosted
Cadey~  
0
Show more
jorts.horse

Unstoppable shitposting engine.

Resources

Developers

What is Mastodon?

jorts.horse

More…