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people will stop me on the street and ask 'why is the nutsling red'? my friend, it represents the blood of our fallen comrades

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you’re approaching me as im stepping out of someones replies and im putting my hand up being like “nah dude you don’t wanna go in there yet”

apple news keeps showing me news alerts for DC and Houston like i would care

people are already nostalgic for minecraft

free name for your psych rock band: Vast Defrens

*looking up from newspaper want ads section* is phone sex still a thing

trump is gonna win in 2024 unless someone comes up with something

one day i will work on a project and i won't break three other parts of it in the process

i wish i could go back in time and get first reply on the 'slurp juice' thread and just be like 'nah man it doesnt work like that at all, please read the wiki'

bought the spicy crawdad ramen; turns out its not ramen its chow mein but i found out too late so now i'm having boring spicy water soup

when is the left gonna learn that you can't own the right by pointing out their hypocrisy or 'believing in science and facts', but instead by making up and spreading bullshit about them that isn't true but also simultaneously can't be disputed

yeah so basically the cops knock on the door and paul opens it with no pants on and there’s a weird guy there behind him holding a hammer and you can see in his face as he is doing the calculation in real time before rearing back and pounding pelosi’s head, and the cops are all like “ohh shit wtf” and scramble i to the house to pull them apart *you’re not really paying attention because my fly is open*

nutsling boosted

maybe the reason you don't get laid is because you're a drunk idiot and your hair smells like raccoon piss

personally im waiting for the grimdark barbie reboot

nutsling boosted
nutsling boosted
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Unstoppable shitposting engine.