Pinned toot
wrestling with local oaf 🐷

the main thing I learn when we have Discourse is that society is really bad at categorization

1+
Pinned toot
wrestling with local oaf 🐷

I was going to delete all my bad toots but I decided it would be faster to delete both of the good ones and claim I'm doing some anti-comedy shit with the rest

0
Pinned toot
wrestling with local oaf 🐷

just stumbling and tripping and repeatedly knocking over this bucket of various heart emojis, hoping my screwball antics can cheer y'all up briefly

Show thread
1+
wrestling with local oaf 🐷 boosted
Toilet Rat

don't buy that johnson's no more tears shampoo, it's a scam!!! i've drank like 4 bottles so far today and i'm still crying

1+
wrestling with local oaf 🐷 boosted
Summerween Trickster

weird gross dream 

@healyn i honestly think he looks better in blue but

1+
wrestling with local oaf 🐷 boosted
triz classic™️

vomit talk 

@healyn do you think the phillie phanatic yorps through his horn/beak situation or is that the nose and there's a normal mouth below it

1
wrestling with local oaf 🐷 boosted
healyn

weird gross dream 

i deleted this from my phone, but i woke up last week after a dream about an animated character named "Yorpy", who just stood in place and vomited all over himself, while staring at me

1+
wrestling with local oaf 🐷 boosted
peptostate

JORTS DOT HORSE

1
wrestling with local oaf 🐷 boosted
Noah S. McKinnon 🇵🇷🇨🇺

You see those shirts @Louisa was posting about?

If you go to the link below, not only can you get them, but (assuming you're willing to drop $45 on some absolutely gorgeous clothing) you can get free shipping with the code "FREESHIPPING821."

Check 'em out:
lnpgaceta.threadless.com/

0
wrestling with local oaf 🐷 boosted
wrestling with local oaf 🐷

you know who is really good at toots? 

the poster reading this

1+
wrestling with local oaf 🐷 boosted
‎ࠋ𐍈ひ𐩀⟆𐀁

T-shirts, t-shirts, TEE SHIRTS 

Oh dip, my LNP shirts arrived already 🎉

Sizing info: at any clothing store, I wear shirts in a women's L. If you've bought from t-shirt sites before, you know you usually have to size up a lot to get the same fit, so the black v-neck is a women's 2XL. The baseball shirt is unisex, so that one runs pretty true to size, and this is an L

lnpgaceta.threadless.com

1+
wrestling with local oaf 🐷 boosted
triz classic™️

selfie, no ec 

every time the sun comes up, i'm in trouble~

1+
wrestling with local oaf 🐷

…and that's why my emotional support sex arse is good, actually, and valid. thank you for coming to my ted talk

0
wrestling with local oaf 🐷 boosted
Jenital Jouster

hahaha holy shit. Nat, I found a new way for you to casually hit on people @dirt

1
wrestling with local oaf 🐷

it's time for a my summer plans/delta variant meme

0
wrestling with local oaf 🐷 boosted
swamp witch activated

SOOOOOO the fleabag merch just dropped 👀👀

uk.yungbludstore.com/

completely psyched to be a part of this (fleabag is so rad!!!) & it's a HUGE deal to me personally, too - after dropping out of uni for mental illness, this project FINALLY helped me upgrade my ancient art tablet and kick off my teen dreams of being an Actual Fuckin Artist 🖤💚🖤💚🖤💚🖤

1+
wrestling with local oaf 🐷 boosted
‎ࠋ𐍈ひ𐩀⟆𐀁

Miniature cabinet of curiosities project 

New object: a pinned Death's Head Moth in a carnelian frame (because I didn't want to do wood again)

All of this is Sculpey Premo polymer clay, and acrylic paint using a 000 miniatures brush and not breathing while I did it

Sorry about the fingers, I couldn't get it angled to the light

Show thread
1+
wrestling with local oaf 🐷 boosted
What if

@pig fuck trevor fuckin bauer

0
wrestling with local oaf 🐷 boosted
Cafe Batstelo :sip:

it's also worth noting that the reason this kind of shit keeps happening is that payment processors such as paypal and major credit card companies are very very very rabidly anti-adult/NSFW/pornographic content and sex work in general

as platforms grow and become prominent, processors crack down on them to sterilize the content they do business with, or they'll pull out of the agreement

so this is not the first, nor will it be the last, platform that goes this way

Show thread
1+
wrestling with local oaf 🐷 boosted
Amelia :skull_hearteyes:

@pig FUCK Trevor BAUer
👏👏
👏👏👏

0
wrestling with local oaf 🐷 boosted
Boaters are cool hats

@pig
Fuck Trevor Bauer
Fuck the Dodgers
And fuck Trevor Bauer twice over

0
wrestling with local oaf 🐷 boosted
schrödinger's gay

Been extending the mural in my garden and integrating the lilac tree on the other side.

I roped J into rendering the wall for me so it was a nice smooth surface which has made it much nicer to do.

It looks a bit busy right now but once I've got the line work sorted the lilac will look more like a focus that side with the blossom remaining wispy 😊

1+
wrestling with local oaf 🐷

let's get a "fuck trevor bauer" going in the chat, folks

1+
Show older
jorts.horse

Unstoppable shitposting engine.

Trending now

Resources

Developers

What is Mastodon?

jorts.horse

More…