they call me dr. 🐷 @pig@jorts.horse

I know it says it's from a boy named Jeremy but this was actually @bryn right?
https://www.clickhole.com/cuteness-overload-this-little-boy-wrote-an-adorable-le-1830526540

I was having a normal work conversation with a client when he suddenly said, in a much softer voice, "not right now, Daddy's on the phone"

all I could say was "you're working from home, right?"

there's something satisfying about sending an email saying "here's what you fucked up but I fixed it in minutes, you oafs" but even better than that would be if they DIDN'T FUCK UP IN THE FIRST PLACE

aaaAaaAAUUuUGggGgGhhhHhhHhHH

if I had a dollar for every time someone presented me with a problem, and then gave me a second one instead of answering a simple question about the first, I would have enough money to reduce this place to rubble

but doctor, I…haha…butt doctor

…but doctor, I am…your long lost son!

did I miss chicken pox posting? I got it right at the end of first grade, so I missed the last few days of school, aka the days when they have given up on teaching and do parties instead

no, YOU are still bitter

so far today I have been told I am a greasy bumpkin and also mild-mannered, it's like they don't even know me

I don't know how to feel when a coworker says "why are you so dressed up?" and the only difference from normal is my shirt has long sleeves

C:\> _

aaaaaa -

just kidding

[exists on a stone that isn't rolling]