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I’d almost forgotten why I chose this screen name lol

Jane because I’m a woman not a man

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I’ve taken a couple edibles and two hard ciders so I’m apologizing in advance

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Today I learned that a dude blocking your car from driving so he could show his wang to you and piss on your bumper is not, in fact, illegal in the state of Oregon

Carpal Tunnel Syndrome: when Doing Crafts becomes self-harm

Update on this, I spent 8 grueling hours in my bathroom cleaning a fleece practically lock by lock lol I want to die m. Hyper focus is an absolute bitch

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Oh yeah. Today is a really bad brain-fog day lol

Oddly enough I’m getting stuff done? Laundry, washing the rest of my brown sheep fleece so I can spin it, and I’m going to pick up a few things at the store even though I feel like a space cadet. I’ll probably spend the rest of the day carding wool. Or playing ACNH idk

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So fun fact:

1. Both gabapentin and caffeine come in similar sized capsules filled with a white powder

2. I keep both in medicine bottles, for convenience

3: carpal tunnel is kicking my ass right now

Possibly related: I haven’t been able to sleep at all tonight

Lmao he got caught because he wrote a memoir and published it while he was still alive.

Repeat after me kids: there’s no statue of limitations for murder

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The first we heard about her was when they took a trip to the beach for a week

Honestly good for them. I hope they fucked

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Shaking my head at the Problematic Age Gap between my grandpa (95) and his new girlfriend (78)

One time I had a lady on the phone who was truly upset her white cloud minnow died. She’d had him for 10 years and had noticed in the last few months it’s spine had gone crooked. I explained that a 10 year old minnow is like a 120 year old person, and that given it lived that long it must mean she was a really good fish keeper. It took her awhile to understand I was saying she did everything right it was just old age and she shouldn’t blame herself for him dying.

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Rembering when I basically worked as a grief counselor when I worked in the aquarium section of a Petsmart. Their fish would die & they’d call, looking for answers why, and half way through the conversation I’d realize that they were really looking for someone to say “it’s ok to love your fish and be sad it died”

One of the things I like to do is scroll through this list of Roman emperors and count how many were murdered

Imagine if we still lived in a world in which the most powerful were regularity assassinated. I don’t think it would be a better world, but it would certainly be more interesting

Pulled out my wool carding machine and zoomed through a pile of wool in about a third of the time it took me to hand card it

The cool thing about having either SCT or Inattentive ADHD is that you don’t notice when people exclude you or make fun of you until they get really obvious about it.

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Remembering that time in second grade when a girl invited everybody in our class to Oakspark for her birthday except me, I didn’t even know about it and found out when my mom took me & a friend to the park at the same time to roller skate. The girl was so mad when she saw us lol 😂 🛼🎢

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Unstoppable shitposting engine.