mason boosted

Currently identifying the swallows in my parents' yard and explaining the distinctions between each species while also saying "I understand you do not care about this as much as I do"

mason boosted
mason boosted

the Dojo down the block from me offers an "intro to BDSM" course after 9pm?

mason boosted

@sweetmercury @jaytom

Charmin: $7.99/12
Quilted Northern: 59¢/100
Store brand: π/lb

mason boosted
mason boosted

I’m the only straight person on Mastodon.com

mason boosted

wait, yall are actually gay? i thought that was just a bit...

mason boosted

@sweetmercury Charmin, I just need to wipe my ass. why are you trying to make me do math?

mason boosted

standing in the toilet paper aisle at the store trying to figure out if the super, mega, or super mega rolls are the best deal

#120 X/6 (95%)
🟩🟩🟩🟨⬛⬇️
🟩🟩🟩🟩⬛⬇️
🟩🟩🟩🟨⬛⬇️
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟨⬇️
🟩🟩🟩🟩⬛⬇️
🟩🟩🟩⬛⬛↘️
worldle.teuteuf.fr

I absolutely knew this but I did NOT know that the country changed its name a few years ago 😂

mason boosted

Mutual aid request 

Finally I have managed to get my car inspection, and I can move forward on getting my CDL and getting to work. Unfortunately I'm now sitting on E, moneywise. I just need to bridge the gap with a bit of , which can be a loan that I can pay back as soon as I'm trained and start earning full wage. I'm hoping that about $300 will tide me over.

paypal.me/rwcarlisle
Venmo: @robertwcarlisle
Cashapp: $rwcarlisle

Anything helps, especially boosts.

food 

Might fuck around and get a sushi roll for lunch, I dunno

mason boosted
mason boosted

Abortion mention, male audacity 

I've had a cis man today claiming to have equal opinion on abortion as people with a uterus and truly fuck right off

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mason boosted
mason boosted

Monkeypox is way too funny a disease name not to be a massive pandemic

Motherfuckers took PPP loans and kept the money while grandpa came out of retirement because capitalist brain rot convinced him that 1) his only value is in his labor and 2) asking to be compensated fairly for that labor is somehow selfish

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Related: was there ever a follow up story to all those boomers who were scabbing for free at local restaurants “to keep them afloat” when the big quit started?

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jorts.horse

Unstoppable shitposting engine.