mason @sweetmercury@jorts.horse

boost if you give goths permission to pose and take photos on your grave after you die

ARIES SEASON

me: working from home gives me the opportunity to focus on tasks free from the the distractions of a noisy office!

brain:

TROUT

TROUT

LET IT ALL OUT

THESE ARE THE FISH I CAN DO WITHOUT

SALMON

I’M TALKING TO YOU

SALMON

me: cool never mind

The misfits ____ your skull

new injury reserve slaps supremely

We all loved the annoying orange until he moved into the WHITE HOUSE!!! BOOM!!! Haha I'll be here all night. You will never make me leave

Knuckle tats: 👊blin 👊k182

Whichever one of you fucks has resumed your harrassment campaign of me:
Hey boo!! Thanks for letting me live rent free in your head, because landlords can get fucked. Also, take that shit back to Twitter you cowardly bitch. No one wants you here.

folks, the lighting in this bathroom is just insanely right

My phone bill auto charged my checking account so I am -$130 currently and still have no job 🙃

If you can help I really appreciate it.

PayPal.me/cutebridge

Proud to work for a Terran harvesting coop that realizes the sunk cost fallacy of attempting to reclaim an infested ship full of "perfect xeno killing machines" and will nuke my colleagues and me in a heartbeat if we break quarantine.

It encourages self-starting, problem-solving, ensures the safety of my colleagues NOT on this creaking ship full of Teeth-in-Shadows (as we call them, colorfully) AND our union can negotiate a nice bonus if we survive this.

Thanks, GEMCORP LTD XXIX INC!

so beto o’rourke is basically the main character of slc punk right

Elon musk here, with a tube™ full of spaghetti™

The band CHVRCHES is pronounced like ‘Chevy Chase.’ Not a lot of people know this actually.

*sees a parishioner praying and weeping at the feet of a Virgin Mary statue* she’s not gonna fuck you dude

Hell yeah I've got clout

Crippling
Lanxiety and depression and just wanna have a break and have fun with friends
O
U
T

LMFAOOOO I TOLD YALL IT WAS A REAL PERSON AND NOT A BOT

all of my friends here are influencers; they influence me to be a better person

woke up with anime hair

Jeffy certainly seems to think my apartment is a piss restaurant