another day volunteering at the betsy ross museum. everyone keeps asking me if they can piss on the flag. buddy, they wont even let me piss on it

shout out to my cat Mindy who just now spotted another cat in the garden and proceeded to lose her shit at such volume that I rushed downstairs thinking a bookcase had fallen on her.

The existence of high femmes implies the existence of wood femmes, dark femmes, and the ever popular half femmes. In this adventure module I shall-

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I think this one broke because Kidd Bandit is too powerful for Mastodon. @ecsaln

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i dunno what the fuck she's up to but i walked past our office and my girlfriend has JORTS DOT HORSE on one monitor and SKELETOR on the other so that's wife material if ever i've seen it

Nyla Rose (the first trans champion of any major wrestling company in America, and a god tier shitposter)

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Here are some professional wrestlers that Mastodon should be aware of. Danhausen

Mastodon is like email because Hillary Clinton is going to lose the 2024 election because of her toots

Tired: Mastodon is just like email
Wired: Mastodon is just like egirls

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Ian boosted

Dear Jorts Dot Horse, Max The Impaler thinks th-

oh. Let's check in on them later.

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Dear Jorts Dot Horse, Hyper Misao thinks you are a superhero protecting love and peace

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jorts.horse

Unstoppable shitposting engine.